Playing Cupid

Ah, Valentine's Day. A happy holiday for lovers, a scourge for the single and horny.

Romance seemed so sweet in the olden days (as with Rob Monroe, Playgirl model at left, who offers a doily valentine and spread hairy legs with candy between them).

Having snagged a few dates for later in the week, I can't help but want to play Cupid for you horndogs out there. Take a gander at the bevy of hung and horny hotties posting on Craigslist.

While I can't guarantee you'll meet them, or even that the links to their ads will remain posted for more than a day, it certainly should give you hope that if you can't find love, at least you can find a huge-cocked pilot in Buffalo (the spectacled stud with goatee, and yes, that erection next to him is real), a Greek circuit stud with a room to share in Miami (the serious-looking one under overhead lighting), or a Dallas daddy with legs spread and a pool to paddle in (mmm).

Sure, it's tough out there. Most online ad photos make ya'll look like the evidence in a CSI show. Lighting, guys. And spare us the spread hole shots. Really. Only a proctologist should know.

But hey, if so many studs are eager to please, and be pleased, there may be hope for all of us.

Well, not everyone. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna shuffle off to Buffalo to choke on some pilot cock.

Fly me to the moon...