1.20.2006

Google Cockodoodle




Jeebus fuckin Christmas. Can't those reichsters get their own porn? Oh, that's right. They can't hire Jeff Miss Piss Gannon any more for their closeted canoodling. Pathetic.

Google reps say they'll fight the subpoena, following its motto, "Don't be evil." Yahoo has complied with a similar demand, following its motto, "Don't wait a minute to roll over and take it like a cheap whore for evil."

(Update, Jan. 25:) Hilarious commentary by the always on-target Mark Morford of SFGate.com.

"Log in to Google and type the words "hot bunny terrorist fluffer banana" into the comely and world-beloved Google search engine. Do it. Do it now.

Oh no wait, make it "Osama butt pancake lube explosives yay." Or better yet, try "homemade nuke porn lollipop kiddie nipple bomb!!!" (Be sure to include extra exclamation points because as we all know, Dubya isn't the brightest of presidents and these will add zing and personality to your entry and make your search terms -- the very ones the Bush administration is right now subpoenaing the Google corporation to gain access to -- really stand out to the FBI and the Department of Justice, which are always in need of a little zing).

It shall be a mini-movement. It shall be called "Operation Screw With the DOJ and Make Lynne Cheney Squirm.

Log in to Google. Type "Karl Rove eaten by giant homosexual squid." Type "George W. Bush beaten to lifeless pulp by swarm of angry kindergarten children." Enter "Samuel Alito loves his 'Weapons of Ass Destruction IV' DVD." It might not be much, but it sure sends the right kind of message. Don't you agree?"


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